How to Transcend Negativity and Rewire Your Brain for Happiness With Mindfulness

“Our happiness depends on the habit of mind we cultivate. So practice happy thinking every day. Cultivate the merry heart, develop the happiness habit, and life will become a continual feast.” ~Norman Vincent Peale

From an evolutionary perspective, happiness is not something that’s much on our radar. Instead, our minds are mostly preoccupied with looking out for danger.

This negativity bias is simply built into our brain—paying more attention to what went or will go wrong is part of our survival mechanism as humans. It’s easy to imagine, therefore, that if we let our thoughts take over, we can soon find ourselves on a slippery slope to unhappiness and despair.

We are not doomed, however. We can overcome our negative tendencies with mindfulness.

Transcending Negativity

Mindfulness can shed a light on our patterns of negative thinking, feeling, and behaving. Understanding our thought patterns and beliefs and how they originated can be liberating. By paying attention to our reactions and emotional responses we can begin to consciously challenge the negative thoughts and limiting beliefs underneath them.

Mindfulness creates the space for our negative thoughts to exist without having to act on them. Paying attention to our internal state, we notice when negative thoughts creep in, and instead of listening to them, we practice detachment. Breath by breath, we observe as our thoughts come in, peak, then dissipate.  We allow them to be—knowing they will eventually pass—with acceptance and without judgment. With practice, we learn to redirect our attention to the present moment, whenever we notice getting lost in the trance of negativity, and investigate our habitual reactions so that we can dismantle them.

With time, we learn to simply observe our negative thinking patterns—doubt, shoulds, complaining, worrying, comparison, blaming, perfectionism, caring what people think, bullying yourself, chronic busyness, or your efforts to control everything—but not give them energy, inviting less and less negativity into our lives.

Making a Mental Shift by Reframing

Taking it one step further, we begin to learn to reframe our negative thoughts and replace them with positive ones, more aligned with what we want to grow.

When we catch ourselves complaining, we can shift focus to one thing we are grateful for at the moment. Instead of passing judgment, we tune into our heart and practice compassion. When our perfectionistic tendencies come up, we forgive ourselves for being so hard on ourselves and practice being “good enough” instead. We slowly release the grip of caring what other people think by practicing self-acceptance. Instead of habitually and mindlessly sacrificing ourselves for others, we affirm our worth and practice self-care and self-love.

Changing our outlook is a slow process. Shifting out of autopilot takes time.  By practicing reframing, whenever we catch ourselves giving into negativity, we trim old patterns etched into our brain and rewire it for positivity and growth. Focusing on what we want to develop instead of letting our negativity take over requires intentionality and mindfulness throughout the day.

Creating Happiness Habits

Rewiring our brain for happiness is possible due to its neuroplasticity, the brain’s ability to reorganize and rebuild itself by forming new connections.

Throughout life, we learn all kinds of skills through practice, whether it’s walking, talking, biking, playing an instrument, cooking, negotiating, parenting, etc.—we learn by practicing, by doing. Likewise, we can learn to be happier by practicing happiness.

Mindfulness is simply awareness and acceptance of what is—and this can be our gate to happiness. Paying attention illuminates the present moment in its entirety. It allows you to show up for the good experiences you might have otherwise missed, as well as move through the hard ones with more ease.

Focusing on the little things that are going well for us at this very moment allows us to experience life wholeheartedly—we let feel the good alongside the bad. We realize our lives are complex, and not as dreadful as our minds would have us believe.

Gratitude can transform our lives. Through practice, we learn to savor the here and now, allowing moments of joy and pleasure in-between times of pain. We learn to seek beauty and magic in every day. Slowly, we awaken to life’s small pleasures, dropping constant worry and distractions from taking over our lives.

5 Happiness Habits to Practice Daily

Happiness is something we can practice and cultivate. We can build up a lasting sense of ease, confidence, self-acceptance, compassion, feeling loved, contentment, and inner peace by creating healthy habits.

Here’s a good start:

1. Start your day by setting an intention for joy—decide to be happy on purpose.
2. Make a list of things that make you happy, bring pleasure and peace—and do more of that daily.
3. Practice gratitude often. What went well today? Who supported you? What brought you a moment of peace? What positive habit did you stick to? What shifted internally?  Where did you find pleasure?
4. Love and nurture yourself from the inside out—self-love and self-care are the pillars of wellbeing.
5. Practice mindfulness as you go through the day. Slow down and move with more intention. Embrace the fullness of each moment. Observe any negative thoughts that come up, and reframe them. Refocus your attention on what you can do to move forward.

Set these habits in motion. Soon you’ll notice yourself becoming more present, grateful, and content.